As I sit here on this Tuesday evening, drinking a glass of
cheap-ass wine after putting the baby to bed, besides thinking about how drunk I'm going to be after 3-4 sips of
this shit riesling, I find myself thinking that I'm feeling a bit isolated these days.
Yes,
Aunt Becky, I'm going to write
that post you skipped after deciding it was too whiny.
I have plenty of acquaintances who are moms, but none who I'm really close with. I have one who I've been "mom-dating" pretty steadily, mainly because her daughter is only a month older than my son, but we're by no means exclusive BFFs. We know each other well as moms - it's the only context in which we've spent time together - and though our parenting styles can be very different at times, we both accept and respect each other's way of doing things and actually enjoy talking about our differences because of that.
But as women, it doesn't seem we have much in common. Our personalities are different, our senses of humor are different, and although the gaps are not too wide to bridge, they can't be ignored completely.
The closest thing I have to a best GF is a friend who is not yet a mom, who still parties pretty hard, and has a husband who makes it virtually impossible for her to hang out with her friends on her own because he's also friends with all of us. And ever since we moved 25 mins away (even though it's only 8 miles), it's been extremely difficult to coordinate a way to spend time together.
Because I work full-time (albeit from home), I can't really join a playgroup and
I'm not sure I'd really want to anymore anyway, and I'm living in a new town where I don't know anyone. I also do not live in a "neighborhood" setting - I have one neighbor on one side with a 6 year-old son who is never home, and a neighbor across the street with what appears to be a 2 year-old daughter, but I'd never know because she has never introduced herself or even waved. (Though she has no problem letting her goddamn dog on my lawn......but that's another story for another day.)
So where does this leave me?
In the motherfucking blogosphere, that's where. And frustrated, to boot.
"Why are you frustrated, JLK?"
I'm so glad you asked. Thanks for caring about my feelings, Blogosphere. See, every day I read these wonderful, awesome, kick-ass blog posts from these amazing women who bare it all for The Internetz to see. In some ways, there are bloggers I feel I know better than the people in my real life because of the things they choose to share on their pages.
Now of course here I am giving the benefit of the doubt (or as my husband says, benefit of doubt - who is right????) and just believing that the public persona matches the private persona of these women. But even if it doesn't - it would take a heck of a masterful writer to pull off some of these personalities if they were in no way a reflection of self. (Again, here's looking at you, Aunt Becky!)
I am constantly hunting for bloggers who live in my neck of the woods. PhizzleDizzle up and moved far, far away (not that she was
that close in the first place, but driving distance at least) and she was really all I had. I've looked at blogs from people in my state who identify themselves as such, and so far I have to say, they're written by women who I don't think I would have ANYthing in common with whatsoever.
There are so many of you out there though who I absolutely
adore - those of you whose pages I read and think "Now THIS chick is someone I could get drunk and have great conversations with!" But then I find out at least in general terms what your geographic location is, and I think "Goddammit! We'd have to get drunk over Skype or some shit!"
And we all know that's just not the same. You especially know this if your spouse/partner is in the military.
Ahem.
Anyway. So I'm grateful to have found all of you over there on my blogroll, because you've made me realize that I am not alone in this crazy ass journey of motherhood/adulthood/womanhood and that there are people out there with the same sick sense of humor and appreciation of random shit that I have. I love you all for it. But I also wish you were all just a car ride away where we could meet up for Mexican food and margaritas or hang out at my place with a glass of
ass Yellow Tail riesling or some Captain & Coke Zero and make fun of stupid people. Or something.
Bottom line - if any of you are heading out to New England anytime soon - hit me up. Because JLK needs more people in her life like you guys.