Sunday, April 24, 2011

If Only

There needs to be a place where, on those days, you can just drop your child (or children) off and know that he or she is in very safe, capable hands until whenever you decide to return.

Image taken from Hollands Jewelers Blog


You know what I'm talking about - a place you can put them when you're seriously on the verge of losing your shit. Where you don't have to call first. You just show up with your frazzled self, hand off the little brat, and come back to pick them up whenever you're feeling better.

I started thinking up some names for such a place:

"Mental Health Day"care

The Sanity Asylum

The Sanity Sandbox

Take a Penny, Leave a Suzie

The Kiddie Kennel

Minor Retreat

The Rest Stop

Whine to Wine

Yes, JLK is being kind of an asshole right now. It's been one of those days and I won't lie, I was fantasizing about what it would be like to have the ability to drop D off somewhere and be like "I'll be back in a few days" and head off to the shore or something for some peace and fucking quiet.

An accurate representation of what my day would have looked like. If I had earplugs.

Please don't get me wrong. I love my son dearly. But today was a nonstop whine- and shriek-fest and I thought my head was going to explode when it was barely 2pm. I kept coming back to the same thought: "When your baby has colic, you tell yourself 'He's just a baby, it's not his fault, it's his only way of communicating.' But at what point can you comfortably acknowledge that he's just a brat sometimes? 11 months? 2 years?"

When does it become okay (in your own head or otherwise) to be like "Okay, kid. Now you're just being a douchebag"?

And I was also thinking what a better place this world would be if moms could go to a neighbor (or anyone else they know and trust, for that matter) and say "I'm about to lose my shit. Can you please take this child before I sell him in exchange for a bus ticket to Hoboken?" and feel okay about it. Feel like a better parent for recognizing her limits and taking a break when needed. Feel like it's okay to take a moment (or 10) for yourself every once in awhile.

As I put D down to bed tonight, my final thought was this:

"Fuck, would it be nice to paint my toenails in the middle of the day again."

Ooooh. If only........


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5 comments:

Alyssa said...

Brilliant. I especially like "Take a Penny, Leave a Suzie"! LOL!

I had one of those days last week. I don't often lose my patience, but by the time DH got home I was ready to pack my bags for a few days (at least)!

Anonymous said...

I know they have drop-off daycares in some cities. My brother and sister-in-law use them when they need to run errands that will take waaaaay longer with my nephew. My nephew seems to really like the places they take him, too - sometimes he even requests them to run errands.

And I think the appropriate age for assuming your child is being bratty is when you know they know what they're doing. Like when my nephew used to look at me before running toward an electric socket, then balled his eyes out when I said no...like not being allowed to electrocute himself was the worst thing ever.

Psych Post Doc said...

Let me know if you find this place I can only imagine must be the true heaven. ;)

When I get to this point with my son, I put him in his car seat and we drive, sometimes for hours. He loves his car seat and almost always goes to sleep and I swing through a drive through and get myself a coffee or chai tea or milk shake and drive somewhere pretty until I think he and I can stand each other again. :)

bm pharmacy said...

So cute, love the photos, having kids is such a blessing.

Vlogger said...

cute Photos of Child. We are Movers and Packers in Kochi

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